|new crazy-straw glasses and flameless candles|
All my classes were great yesterday, with interested, engaged students. My heart was simultaneously broken and mended by spending time with Clyde. And last night at the reading, I was treated to Natanya Pulley’s work, including her snort-laugh-accurate fiction about reading too many maudlin creative writing submissions. I got to visit at length with a friend I hadn’t seen in a while, and I got to see my friend’s lovely adult daughter, whom I hadn’t seen since she was 3’ tall.
|practicing his flamenco|
Here are some highlights of the afternoon's conversations with Clyde, Master of the Segue:
M: Where would you like to eat?
C: Somewhere they speak Spanish.
M: Why is that?
C: Because I want “seis cheese quesadillas, por favor.” (recites his order, non-stop from school to the restaurant)
C: Can I go over and talk to those boys? (two young boys with their parents at another table)
M: No, I’d like you to stay here, please.
M: Because sometimes people eating dinner together would like privacy.
C: But I think I might know one of them. At least he has glasses like the boy I know.
M: I’d rather you stay here with me. How many pets do you have at your house now?
C: (counting on fingers) One fish, because Julian died, and three cats, and five chickens.
M: I thought you only had one or two chickens left?
C: We found some more.
M: So you have five?
C: No. I only saw one. We have one chicken, and the duck died.
M: That’s kind of sad.
C: Yeah, but I have to ask you a very important question, Nat. (all my grandkids call me Nat)
C: How did the very first man get here without a mom to born him?
M: That IS a very important question. Maybe he started out as a chimp, and over the years, he got more and more like a man until he was a human.
C: That’s what my mom said.
M: Well, what do YOU think?
C: I think he was made out of mud, and the first mom was made out of his ankle bone.
M: Where did you hear that?
C: From my mom. (I doubt this)
M: Maybe the first man evolved from a fish. That means he started out as a fish and changed a little bit, then a little more, until he was man hundreds of thousands of years later.
C: I know how to tell the difference between a lung fish and a gill fish. Want me to tell you?
M: Yes, please.
C: A gill fish goes like this (makes fanning gills by his ears with his hands) and breathes through his gills. A lung fish has lungs inside his body and breathes air.
C: Did you know there are only two kinds of fish that aren’t fish, they’re MAMMALS! (very excited)
M: What are they?
C: Whales and dol-a-phins. (3 syllables)
C: I told my teacher that if my friend is at school on Monday, I’m gonna punch him in the face.
M: (long conversation on the drive home about being nice, teaching XXX how to be nicer by Clyde setting a good example, XXX growing up and having his own children and teaching them how to be nice because he learned it from Clyde and others, kids who aren't as lucky as Clyde and whose parents don’t always know how to teach them to be nice, blahblahblah)
M: (later, to Clyde’s mom) Tell your mom our new plan for teaching XXX how to be nice.
C: No! I hate that stupid plan! I’m gonna punch him in the face! (we have to work on that)